This just in from hell

I am recruiting new soldiers for my next onslaught on the Christians.

Requirements:
1. not gay
2. follow me as your savior
3. hate jesus/god
4. commit murders, go to jail, get the death penalty, or just commit suicide (basically you have to be in hell)
5. be prepared for an unholy Holocaust!!!!!

P.S. yes i do have internets in hell faggots

first day reported from hell

well, im just sittin here listenin to some nigrahs screamin thinkin bout squattin a rambone....

signed, satan